These blogs are good for SOMETHING

I just looked up a post from last year to make Ramen Salad. Funny I didn't have a copy printed anywhere. I'm sure it's tucked away somewhere I haven't looked. Anyway there hasn't been much to write about. I received some old National Geographics for finding pictures I might want to use in some sort of art thing. I sat and read for a while about the Shakers. That inspired me to get up and wash the storm door and regular door to the kitchen. I volunteered my house as the next location for an art get-together. So I thought I would start cleaning. What I would be embarrassed most by is the splatters and dirty walls in the kitchen, so those got taken care of today. Regular counter, stove, and floor cleaning will follow. Next, all my hoodiedoodies in the living room need to be dusted. And all horizontal surfaces. I brought up some raku pottery from the basement that I forgot about. I rotate my tzchotchke. I wanted to get rid of some of this loose change laying all over the place, so I hauled it to Meijer to use their Coinstar machine. It charges 8.9 cents for every dollar, but it is well worth it. The first haul brought me about 25 bucks, and the next time 30 bucks. And that's taking all the quarters out first for carwashes. The money is going in the bank because I bought a whole crapload of art supplies and put it on the credit card. I'm bad like that. I've gotten into distressed and altered art. I seem to be happier making little projects now and then.

My Tattoo Ivy Pants

  

Cooking a Frozen Turkey, Projectile Vomit, and Newfound Creativity

What to write about first? Let's get chronological first. A few days ago I decided turkey dinner would be just great for Valentines. So I took the turkey from the freezer THE NIGHT BEFORE. The next day I found it was way too frozen to cook in the oven. Just the skin had thawed. But wait! I can get away with cooking frozen anything in my crock pot/roaster. I have a traditional crock pot, then I have this thing that's a bit bigger that sits on a hot plate, and it's more of a wide oval shape. Anyway the bigger one was still to small for this turkey. So first I went to Ace Hardware. I always try to help the little business out if there is a remote possibility they might have what I want. They didn't, so on to Wal-Mart! There at the end of one aisle, they had a few clearance items, one being the biggest crock-pot I've ever seen in my life, only when they get this big, they call them ROASTER OVENS. It had a card taped to it, CLEARANCE, DISPLAY UNIT, SOLD AS IS, $32. It didn't have any box or book, but what's so hard about using a crock pot? 18 quart. It looked like I could fit two turkeys in it side by side. Plus it had an insert with three bread loaf pans. So I can make bread or host my own litte buffet. So I put it in the cart, and it pretty much took up the whole cart, and trudged to the check-out. The woman there rang it up, $29! So I went home and made the turkey. It wasn't done until 8, and by then I had gotten us some Chinese take-out. So the rest of the week we have been enjoying turkey leftovers.

**Warning. Talk of vomit next paragraph.**

Little Dog has been feeling better. Two nights ago he threw up in the kitchen when I was cooking the gravy on the stove. He had been acting okay before that, so I wasn't too worried. Before we ate I gave him his own food and he gobbled it up. He had appetite, so again, I wasn't worried. Later in the evening I was watching tv on the couch and the dog was sleeping on the loveseat. He started whining, like he's lonely and wanted me to sit by him. Like I said before, it's not like we don't accomodate! So I went over by him and sat, and he fell asleep. A few tv programs later, he stood right up, looked over the edge of the loveseat, and looked at me like GET ME DOWN NOW. I put him on the floor thinking he was going to run to the door because it had been a while since he had been out. He stood right where I put him and started the Vomit Sequence, where his neck extends in and out of his body to bring a hurl up on deck. I grabbed him real quick and ran him into the kitchen with the intention of trying to hold him over the trashcan. I knew I couldn't get him outside fast enough. I ran really fast, but I knew I wouldn't make it, so I stopped suddenly just when he hurled. And IT kept going. It must have spanned over five feet. It was just so gross but it was so funny, I couldn't help but laugh. The dog was still in my hands, so I just proceeded to take him outside. Husband was just going into the garage. "Hey honey, ya gotta see this! The dog threw up when I was running with him, and it's all over!". Husband just stared at me, "eeegh". "No! It's funny, ya gotta see it!". So he came in, and looked. I don't remember laughing so hard. Just the whole scenario of such a small dog making a mess like this, and me running with him just to keep it off the rug. We laughed until we cried. We laughed until we choked. I now appreciate my husband more than ever, I've found someone who is as childish as me. I even took a picture. Dare me to post?

I couldn't wait to find a rug to put in the corner for our little eating area, but I brought the cafe table up from the basement anyway. I wanted my own little space to create and watch cars go by. So I set it all up, moved furniture to make the space. I got right to work on my Tattoo jeans. I have birthmarks on my left leg, and when I was little I thought I would get a tattoo of a vine of ivy to cover it. Then I got older, and I matured accepting my flaws. My view of tattoos also changed, and don't find them aethetically pleasing as just plain skin. Tattoos never look as good as they day they were created, so these faded artworks on people do not appeal to me. I still liked the idea of the ivy as wearable art, so I practiced drawing ivy for a little bit, then went to work on a pair of jeans. I can't wait to wear them out and show my friends.

Today's project

Some time ago I bought some vinyl to re-cover the seats of the kitchen chairs with. The cat scratched them up and they split and looked bad. I was sick of looking at them today and I didn't feel like cleaning the kitchen. The actual stapling down the vinyl and folding it it strategic places didn't take long at all. Taking out the nine million staples in the old stuff took all day. The old coverings were cream colored, the same color as the legs and back. The new stuff is the typical tan color you see in car interiors. It's alright. It was the cheapest that they had at the fabric store that would remotely go with the chair color. I didn't want to risk the expensive stuff since this is my first re-cover job, plus I don't know if the cat will tear these up too. My idea is to get these chairs all purtied up and put a small cafe table in the corner of the living room so we have a cute little eating area. I'd put a pretty throw rug underneath, since hubby has a hard time holding onto a fork. We've been eating around the coffee-table for the last couple of years and I think it's a bit undignified. We're a little old to be crouching and shoveling food into our mouths. I think we should at least be able to sit upright.

I bought my husband a massage for Valentine's day, and that was today. I scheduled it when I had mine a few weeks ago, the same day I was told I wasn't going to be working at the store anymore. I went anyway even though I was upset, and I'm glad I did. It was really good and thorough, good enough to buy one for hubby! The lady had it really decorated nice inside. Hard to believe someone can do anything creative with a strip-mall space. He came home smelling of the fresh smelling massage salve. I'm glad he's easy to shop for.

Please don't crap on my pillow

Lately the cat has been sleeping on my bed a lot. Yesterday was his day to go to the vet to get his yearly shots. Everyone at the vet's office practically forgets I have a cat, because they see him only once a year. Anyway he was sleeping on my bed again yesterday. I left him there until the very last minute to take him in. I crept downstairs and got the pet carrier and put it on the floor with the door up and open. Then I went and grabbed the sleepy cat and wrapped him tightly in a blanket and put the slid the cat-sausage in the cage and shut the door. He was good at the vet's, but they left us alone in the room a little too long for his taste. He was on my lap, and he NEVER does that. Back at home he didn't hold any grudges. We are so surprised he isn't one of those spiteful cats that we've hear horror stories about. This is the first cat for both my husband and I, so we are both grateful he isn't one of THOSE cats. We have a running joke, whenever we see one of us has "neglected" the cat in some way, we joke that cat is gonna crap on the other's pillow. "Aw Kitty, did Jenny not top your food dish off? I'd go crap on her pillow if I were you". "Aw Kitty, did Shannon hang out with his friends too late to brush you? I'd go crap on his pillow if I were you."
Sick? A little.
Funny? You betcha.

Questioning my sanity

The good news is that I'm not grinding my teeth here. Bad news is that bad news keeps coming. Last week was my first week home, and the dog got gravely ill. Some sort of intestinal infection. Monday night I thought I saw him eating something in the yard, like cat crap. Tuesday he shook all day and throught the night. Wednesday he had bloody diarhea and felt very hot and had shallow breathing. Took him to the vet, got an antibiotic shot and instructed to feed him only chicken and rice or ground beef and rice. Instructed to call immediately if the dog vomited. Sometime Wednesday night the dog vomited on the bed and it went through ALL the bedding. Thursday called vet dog vomited and was intructed to not give him any food until Friday, starting with rice and cottage cheese. Thursday night slept on the couch as bedding dried. Dog was content with his own bed for once on the floor. Friday brought in stool sample to check for parasites. Took dog in to get blood tested. Liver and kidney enzymes high, suspected he's not flushing out bad stuff because he is not drinking. Gave him "hydration therapy": put i.v. under his skin to develop a small hump. Water/fluid is then absorbed into organs. I wanted to sleep on the couch again Friday night but the dog absolutely wouldn't have it. He kept going into the bedroom and wanted to be put up. I had to get all the bedding together from the basement and put the bed together. Dog is quite content eating cottage cheese and rice. Had to take dog in for hydration therapy Saturday and Sunday. I knew the dog was out of the woodwork Sunday when he chased the cat. Monday took the dog in for another blood test to see if hydration therapy worked. Kidney and liver enzymes still high. Vet explained since the dog is acting and eating fine, this is caused by a dog getting older. Dietary accomadations can be made for this, and if needed hydration therapy can be done at home. We are just at the dietary thing now. I told him I felt like a short order cook, chicken cooking in one pan, rice cooking in another.

So after this emotional rollercoaster, I get news from sis's boyfriend of, let's just call it alarming attention-getting behavior on her part. She had the cops take him away a few weeks ago, (this really needed to be done for him to get help, he slid back into a crack habit) now she's feeling lonely. So when she knows that he's with his family and she wants attention/money RIGHT NOW, she called with some self-destructive drama. So he had to go flying to Grand Rapids, made it there in 45 minutes, when come to find out she was hungry, wanted to be taken out to eat, and go grocery shopping. I'm ready to disconnect the phone by now.

But wait! There's more!

Got a call yesterday who is also friends with the friend with cancer. Friend with cancer had Stage 4, the worst, with 6 months to 2 years to live. It has spread to her hip, thigh of her other leg, and head. She just though she had a sinus infection she couldn't shake. Her husband took out a life insurance policy when they married, but no health insurance. How nice is that?

Now the dog is well, I'm going to kick up the job search now. I need to get out of here to occupy myself and my mind with other than this sadness. I need to get away from the phone.