Party Success

Saturday was the party. Luckily I started making dips and salads the night before, because I left cleaning to the last minute. About half the people I invited didn't come, but it was kind of a relief, we only had room for those who came! We had biker rings to for everyone to pick out for themselves. People really had fun with that. It was neat seeing the most straight-laced people pick out a biker ring. The kids really had fun with them too. A couple of our close friends brought their poker table, and there was some serious Texas Hold 'Em going on in the garage. The smokers pretty much hung out in the garage. I let my husband turn on the furnace in there, and it was actually pleasant! It wasn't the usual cold and damp. The furnace pulled out some of the smoke too, so it wasn't overbearing like it usually is. One guy brought his guitar, but he didn't start playing until 3am! One of the girls that came braided his hair, so we started calling him Willie. We had chili, jambalaya, meatballs, Ramen salad, potato salad, cheesey bread, brownies, cake, chips, salsa, guacamole, and cheese dip. I think that's it. Oh yeah, veggies and dip too. By night's end, some chili, cake, Ramen salad, and Wheatables were left. I really impressed my mother in law. She was standing there when I kept pulling all this stuff I made out of the fridge. She kept telling me she was really impressed, she didn't think I liked to cook. She called the next day to ask for the cheese spread recipe!
I was really glad I had the party, we had a good turn-out and everyone had fun. There was just the usual mess, but nothing too bad. I would do it again in a heartbeat!

The car saga continues....

I got the police report and the estimate and took them to my insurance agent. We went outside, she took a picture of the damage, and said the agency will just send me a check in the mail! That's it! I'm sure I'll be out some money if I want a rental car, but if it means not having to deal with that wacky woman, it is worth it. Yes, she hit my car. Yes, she should pay it. But no, I seriously don't think we are dealing with a woman with a full deck here. Someone who hangs out with people with the potential to be a murderer! No thanks. I just want her to forget me. And better yet not learn where I live.

Next stop, Lawrence Welk music and Sansabelt pants

When I was little, I never thought I'd like coffee, dark chocolate, feta cheese, or salmon. Well, now I like all of those. Now here's the worst yet: Sardines. I've been reading all over the place how important it is for us to get our omega 3's, and the most easiest way to get them is in sardines. So I brought home a can from the store. Packed "Mediterrean Style", in olive oil and herbs. I couldn't help but wonder why my parents ate this nasty, stinky fish bait. So I opened the can, and the stench brought the cat out from wherever he was hiding. Then the dog hobbled into the kitchen with a look like "Whatcha got there?". So I got a fork and held my breath and took a bite. Not bad! Kinda stronger in flavor than tuna and salmon, but along those lines. These are not for the faint of heart, with the bones (the bones are soft, you eat them too) and the guts and the skin, it makes for a nasty sight. The smell was the instant turn-off for me. But they're good! Now I find myself craving them! No I'm not pregnant!
So should I call AARP now or wait a few years?

Here's what is going on the comment card at the cafeteria:

Don't tell me you close at 9:30. It is now 9:00.
Don't get flustered with me that you put the breakfast food away.
Don't cook this afternoon's lunch while you cook my pancake. It's burning.
Don't try to hide the burnt side of my pancake in the container.
I saw it when you flipped it.

Dammit! Back to the repair shop I go AGAIN.

Last year a friend of mine ran into my car while I watched one of her kids while she picked the other one up from school. Since her dad is her insurance agent, it got taken care of rather quickly. It was still a pain in the ass, especially having to drive around in a crap-assed Suzuki rental car. Anyway, little more than a year later, and a different car, I got rear-ended today. I was sitting watching this person back up in this humongous Ford Dually. The damn thing actually beeped when it backed up! Then bam! Right into me. If I didn't jump out of the car right away, I'm sure she would have kept on driving. The friend I was meeting for lunch showed up right after it happened. The clearcoat is scratched, and I had a cop come out to document it. I wanted a police report to make it known this dingbat is going around banging into people. The corner bumper got caught with the trailer hitch. Ends up the woman who hit me is kind of famous in our community for her personal dramas ending up on the front page. You know, the typical courtroom stuff, husband trying to kill her and her boyfriend, extorting money from her practice. After talking to a couple friends about it, they all say the same thing: she's crazy. The guy at the body shop said the same thing. It got me to thinking, do I really want to get involved with this wack-job? She gave me her phone number and she said she didn't want to involve the insurance company if we could. Ends up she brings the body shop lots of business. I did call her, of course she didn't answer, and left a message to call me and the cost of the estimate. If she doesn't call, like I said, I don't think I'm going to push the issue.
I needn't be wacked over a little clear-coat.

Kick-Ass Cheese-Spread Recipe

1 block of cream cheese
1 jar Kraft Roka Blue cheese spread
1 jar Kraft Old English cheese spread
1 tsp. garlic powder

Combine all and chill overnight.

The jars of cheese spread are usually found near the Velveeta, and the jars can be used as little drinking glasses. Hope this will help you find it in the store!

Please speak into the microphone! 

Better than Metamucil!

Today the chihuahua was sniffing around in the spare bedroom where my husband keeps his clothes and junk, and happened upon a pair of his dirty underwear on the floor. After a thorough sniffing, the dog tore out of there and ran for the door. The second he hit the grass he took care of business. No sniffing to find a spot, nothing. With that I concluded I married one stank-assed dude.

Ps- I honestly thought those were clean underwear that fell out of the laundry basket.
Really!

Here comes the snow again!

This time of year we get a bit of a warm spell. All of the snow melts. The home improvement stores bring out the lawn and garden stuff and the grills. I notice a lot of people come in for tanning at the ladies circuit gym I go to. And then it happens. We get dumped on. That is starting to happen right now. The nice puffy snow is starting to accumulate on the grass. Before, it seemed like winter wasn't so bad this year, and then this. This is what makes for a loooong winter! This is what gives me a cold sick feeling in the pit of my stomach when Nice Crisp Colorful Fall turns into Cold Windy Bitter-Cold Fall. I know it's going to be a long time before we can open the windows and go outside without wearing a heavy coat and gloves.

Knock it off with the crudites, will ya?

With the popularity of DIY shows and food shows, some of the regular stuff in our life has been renamed pretentious bullshit names. This past Christmas my mother in law joked she was bringing the crudites, pronounce CREW DIT TAYS. Whatever. I had no idea what they were, I figured with a name like that, must be some fancy appetizer. WRONG! I was looking around at menus on cooking.com and saw crudites on there. They're veggies and dip! A veggie tray! For crying out loud.
It was bad enough when Ralph Lauren was then pronouced Ralph lo-REN, then Joe Everyone caught on, and once again it is Lauren, like the girl's name. And the automobile, Jaguar. That one is Jag E War. Good Lord! If the so-called upper echelon want to re-name their cars and designers to make themselves feel special, by all means, whatever blows your skirt up. But please leave my veggies and dip out of it.

Valentine's started early

Sunday my husband was going to the gas station and wanted to know if I wanted anything. "Chocolate". Then I changed my mind, that particular gas station reeks of whatever they clean the place with, and I figured any food from there would taste like it also. So he went into the other room and came back with a heart-shaped box and a card. Russell Stover no less! He was going to wait 'til Monday, but could see I needed my fix NOW. So right then and there I pounded away about a quarter of the box. Then I was happy.
So last night for Valentines day I ate away at probably half of the chocolate that was in there. Then ran and got on my workout clothes, and figured the workout place was only going to be open 15 minutes by the time I got there. I put my regular clothes back on, after all the chocolate, 15 minutes of working out wasn't going to do jack squat for me.

Men! Ya Can't Live With 'Em...

And ya can't staple party invites to their hand. I leave before my husband does in the morning. If I want to tell him anything, I don't bother talking to him because he's asleep. Unless I need money. Honey, ya got ten bucks I can have? "Mwuhmuhmuh un manna ma". In your wallet? Thanks honey! Hey, at least I asked. He won't remember, but I did ask! But if I need to ask him something that I need him to remember, we arranged a system. I leave a note in his cigarrette cellophane. That way he grabs his smokes, and he definately sees it. Before I would leave a note on the table, but he'd always miss that. Anyway back to the invites! He left the ones he was supposed to take to work on the counter yesterday. They were on top of his smokes! I'm sure the thought pattern went something like this: "Where's my smokes? Oh yeah, under here" and he tossed the invites on the toaster oven where I found them this morning. So to be sure he knows I want him to take them this morning, I took the invites, his smokes, his Zippo, and his cell phone and bound them all together with one of those huge rubberbands they wrap newspapers in. The rubber band only went around 4 or 5 times. Maybe that got his attention.

Happiness Is A New Bra

Finding one that fits is sheer bliss.

It's time to party

Usually this time of year to beat the winter blahs I have one of those make-up parties. I gave that up last year. This year I wanted to do something, and what better way to beat the blahs than to have a party for my husband.
I made the invites at work today, they look like a postcard, only a little too big for a post-card stamp and too flimsy to mail. Hey, ya gotta work with what you can smuggle out. Am I right?
So I took my previous post's picture with him on the flaming bike. In case you missed it, the front reads: Shannon: The Man. The Myth. The Mullet. On the flip side the card reads: The Birthday. Not a milestone, but nonetheless a reason to get out of the house and eat. Join us at ours for a birthday open house, with all things "Shannon": Spicy and not so spicy food, beer, and biker rings. Black clothing optional! Please join us. Sat. Feb. 26, 6:PM-?

I started party shopping today! Two big bags of frozen meatballs, and a bunch of stuff to make chili. I already have some assorted pops from the last time we had people over (that's SODA for non-midwesterners).

I wrote out a few invites for Shannon to take to work to give to his friends, but for the life of me, I couldn't think of their names. All I hear about these guys is how they fart on each other when they are fixing cars. There's three guys, the oldest one is the uncle of the other two. He's the only one of the three I could remember his name. The other two ended up being "Stinky" and "Not So Stinky".

Here is a Photoshop'd picture of my husband. This will go on the invites I'm sending out later this month. I decided to have a party/open house instead of having my usual make-up party. 

Those are real cups and saucers stuck on the outside. 

This sign always cracks us up entering and leaving Petoskey. 

Sculpture in front of Watershed Council building. 

Gaslight District, downtown Petoskey, MI. 

Watershed Council building.